Sick

I.feel.awful.

Wednesday I woke up with a bit of a stuffy nose, figured allergies.

Thursday I woke up with a very stuffy nose, and my voice half gone. I went in to work because I figured I had to. It is NOT smiled upon to take sick days. People admire those who don’t or “are too busy” to take them. So I exposed everyone at work an felt horribly guilty the whole time. But I still figured this was just a couple day thing. I “never” get *really* sick. Then I went home and taught the first class with dogs for a group of students. I felt so bad that even dog training didn’t leave me happy.

Friday I could barely breath and had no voice. At all. As in me trying to yell resulted in nothing but air. I stayed home from work. I tried to sleep. I tried to get better. It didn’t work.It was my hubby’s birthday. I tried to make the day happy for him when he got home at about 9:30PM. But he spent his birthday taking care of me. And all of my conversations with him were via word document. We also had volunteered to run some science events on Saturday, and since I was feeling bad he helped me finish getting ready for mine. Until 3AM. Long after I was in bed.

Saturday was a bit better, had some voice back, as long as I didn’t mind pain. Which was good because I was running the darn events. It was a LOT of fun but also very hard on my body, and again, horrible guilt for exposing all the kids. OH WELL. Came home, he napped a couple hours, we went to his birthday part. Exposing all of our friends. Who were awesome and sweet and included me in stuff even though I was a walking germ fest. I hope to god none of them got sick. We played games and “talked” and played Rock Band until after 2AM. Which was way later than I should have/wanted to stay out..but it was my hubby’s birthday…and I didn’t want to cut it off for him.

Woke up this morning sickest I’ve been yet. I feel so bad I just want to cry. Did nothing all day but sit and sleep. The hubby is taking great care of me. But still. I have no sick leave left at work. And I know it would be frowned upon to stay home. But I think I’m going to have to….because right now I could not drive a car, not enough of me is “here.” Designing structures so no one gets killed? Maybe not the best idea.

I hope to god I’m better before Wednesday, when I have two  more classes. Because this is not the kind of thing where I can just get a sub for the classes. And I can’t push them back a week, because I have other classes starting. So I don’t know what I’d do. The only other time I’ve had to do this I offered my students a free private lesson on anything they wanted…but none of them actually took me up on it. So I just felt guilty. UGH.

I hate being sick :-( Glad I’m not a mom yet. That would be hard. Another thing you can’t just get a sub for…

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